Hi Everyone,
About two weeks ago, I was listening to an interview. The host asked his guest, “What is your number one pet peeve?” Without thought, the guest replied, “Liars.” The host said, “Me too.” I also agreed. Then I quickly changed my mind. This is why.
Liars are fascinating people! I am serious. Not only do they have to find the time to create the lie they want to spread like a virus they also have to convince one or more people! Convincing others is done with the delivery. That makes them more interesting, intoxicating! Because each of us is (supposedly) different, liars have to know their audience. If they don’t, their tone, pace, verbal and visual vocabulary is all for naught. They would be caught in their lie. Here’s where it gets entertaining.
Everyone has at least two tells. For anyone who doesn’t know, tells are little signs that show when people are lying. Primary tells are easy to spot. Secondary tells can be a bit tricky. Fortunately for me, due to a series of circumstances in my life that I didn’t know would be helpful, I’ve been pretty good at detecting both. I understood why people lie before I read, Evelin Sullivan’s, The Concise Book of Lying in September 2006. Since then, I’ve honed my skills. I get why people lie.
Personally, I love it when people lie to me and others. I’ll let people lie to me over and over. Sometimes I want to hand them a set of batteries, so they can keep going, like the Energizer Bunny. I want to see just how far they’ll go. What they’ll say. I want to know everything. Depending on the circumstances, I may even help them keep their story going. It’s like being in a moral laboratory. That might sound strange to some, but liars show us who they really are. And like Suze Orman says, “When people show you (exactly) who they are, you better pay attention.” Lies define us, our character.
As a square peg, I’m not a good liar. If I stray from the moral and ethical, I’ll get caught. I learned that at a young age. I haven’t practiced lying so I haven’t mastered it. But one day I told a lie and it was a dozy! Here’s why.
One summer day in 2012, as I sat in the passenger seat of a hot car with no air conditioning, I took off my cover up over my tank top. The female driver noticed that I had scratch marks on my back and asked me about them. Suspicious for months that she was trying to “flip” me, I decided to make a point. I said, Oh yea. I met up with an old flame. We’ve been having a lot of sex lately. Especially outside before the security cameras are installed. I’m going to miss that. Sex outside. And him. Ever done it outside before? She said she had. She wasn’t very convincing. I was. She probably spread the word on social media like that chicken who always screamed that the sky was falling. If you don’t know what I mean, it’s a picture book.
The funny thing is I was lying before I knew what I was doing! It was like that moment in, The Invention of Lying, when Ricky Gervais told an, “untruth”. Pretty good lie for on the fly, was what I thought of my lie not his.
Have I lied since? I’d be hard pressed to say I have. I like my character just the way it is. Besides, lying takes up too much time. You’ve got to keep up the lie, wonder if anyone believes you and remember what you said. One lie leads to another. My grey matter has time for other things. Lying is a waste of time. Figuring out why people lie isn’t. I’ve been practicing.
Was I having sex outside? Not that summer. Maybe I never have. But I did have a mosquito bite on my back. The itching was unbearable but I finally reached it, scratched it.
The point of today’s blog is this. There is a child rhyme that goes like this, “Liar, liar, pants on fire, hanging on the telephone wire.” That means that if you decide to lie, you will be caught and spanked hard, hence your bottom feeling like it is on fire. This really doesn’t apply to today’s thinking since few people spank or discipline their children, but I’ve seen a lot of people get burned. Are you a liar? Are your pants on fire? They might be.
The moral laboratory is closed.
Thank you for reading, A. Rebel’s Rant!
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